"The Mother's Dream"

As I held my baby in the hospital, a poem from years ago came to my mind, and I couldn't stop thinking about it. At my father's condo, I ransacked my storage boxes trying to find the booklet I had put together in ninth grade. I knew I had to find it. And then I read these words; words I had not read in ten years:

"The Mother's Dream"

by William Barres

I'd a dream to-night

As I fell asleep,

Oh! the touching sight

Makes me still to weep;

Of my little lad,

Gone to leave me sad,

Aye, the child I had,

But was not to keep.

As in heaven high,

I my child did seek,

There, in train, came by

Children fair and meek,

Each in lily white,

With a lamp alight;

Each was clear to sight,

But they did not speak.

Then, a little sad,

Came my child in turn,

But the lamp he had,

Oh! it did not burn;

He, to clear my doubt,

Said, half turned about,

'Your tears put it out;

Mother, never mourn,'

I knew these words were from my little Ty. He wants me to know that if I am sad, he cannot truly be happy. My grief is his grief. But he is ok. And he wants me to know that, so we all can be happy. I cannot tell you how much comfort this poem has brought me. I have no doubt it was meant for me to find, to remember, to understand. My baby is safe. And he is happy and waiting for us.