Fear Factor

If babies had the capability to perform on the show Fear Factor, they would win hands down. Tonight, my daughter indulged in my biggest nightmare.

There we were in the relief society room, eating El Pollo Loco as a family and scarfing dinner before our obligatory Pioneer Trek meeting. Seated on the floor, we were battling Aiyana's persistent efforts to spill our food everywhere, so when she decided to roam a few feet away to play with the curtains, I was grateful to finally eat my food in peace! After a minute, Dan noticed her chomping on something and hurried over to sweep it out of her mouth.

"Was that . . . was that a bug?" I asked with hesitancy.

"All I know is that it had a hard shell on it," Dan answered.

I literally. physically. gagged. Repeatedly.

and then I noticed Aiyana's little fist still holding onto the remains of her munched-on victim. It took me a split-second to recognize the tan, striated underbelly of a cockroach.

I jumped to my feet and ran away, cringing, wringing my hands, and shrieking in horror and disgust. While pleading with Dan to get it away from her, I couldn't even look at my baby girl anymore. And I refuse to share straws with her for the remainder of the night.

Roaches are an absolute true phobia for me, stemming from a childhood where they popped up out of nowhere -- behind the shower curtain; or climbing up shampoo bottles; once on my leg and even under the arch of my foot; and worst of all, even my own mother chasing her five children in hysteria as our unity as siblings became "every man for himself!" and we locked each other out of bedrooms to save ourselves! (It didn't matter that my mom says it was just a wadded up tissue that she used as her prank. We weren't willing to wait around and see because sometimes it was not just a tissue thrown at us!)

Needless to say, the image of my baby crunching on roach shell still makes me sick and I don't know why i just wrote about it, except perhaps one day say to Aiyana, "Fear is definitely not  factor for you."